Fallin’

(4 Fashanos 5115: The Landing)

As she spoke the words, absolute terror flooded her heart, her everything. She heard her own voice name the song. Or at least the promise of one. And she knew it was a true one. She could not remember thinking the thought, just suddenly, in response to such a simple motion … it was out there. And somehow, she had said it. Aloud.

Years of music practice usually helped her in a crisis, so as her hands began to tremble, she willed them to be still. When her eyes began to fill, when her legs wanted to flee, she prayed for calmness to her heart. After what seemed an endless pause in the conversation, her mind found something for her hands to do, and with that, she turned the conversation to something else.

Probably not successfully, but illusion was all she had at that moment.

Now, back in her room, she had to face it. Channel it. Somehow make sure it did no damage as it fell out of control, as she wrote this song. How did the saying go? In for a silver … in for a pound. That was the ultimate aftermath of this song, it would commit her heart and soul to something so perilous.

She reached for her harp. It had to begin with a bass line that mimicked a heart beat through out the entire chord progression. As she experimented on her strings, nothing seemed to work. She put the task itself out of her mind.

Drawing her harp close, she pulled a soul-searing melancholy sound from it as she filled the music with her confusion and her feelings. Using her mother-tongue, she sang all her fears, her insecurities. Tears streamed down her face, but she did not sob, she did not weep. Her voice rang out in beautiful Elven syllables, giving form to all her questions and doubts. She finally ended the heart-pouring session with the harp by voicing the names that she was willing to claim to see this through.

Almost 3 hours had passed, she was exhausted and still confused. But neither was going to change anytime soon. That was out of her hands.

She reached for a warm cloak and walked to the Shrine at the Lake of Dreams. There, she collapsed at the altar, and gave herself into the grace of the Lord of Dreams, looking for his mercy in what lay before her.

It should not be so complicated. What had she done wrong?

Sleep took her quickly.

Author: GSBardess

A young bardess named Luxelle is currently learning her trade and hoping to one day make a name for her songs in GemStone IV. Follow along with her adventures in life and song.

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